Nhorik stupid tales and misadventures

[gordan]

I've always been a curious person.

It was ten days that I worked for the crow's nest port, they paid well, kill reptilian men and pirates on the coast, easy jobs, and paid well, I didn't think something could go wrong.
until I saw that troll.
A troll? in this area? it was bizarre, even if my knowledge of these giants of the north was reduced to the savages in the sewers of Cordor, their repugnant aspect certainly did not make them aesthetically pleasing, so I shot him an arrow.
I regret it soon after.
A woman? the voice that came out of the troll was not at all what I expected, a female voice, light, polite, charming, and my curiosity continues...

I immediately asked for forgiveness, I had no idea that the trolls were able to speak, but this not only could but was incredibly friendly, she said that she did not leave her house often for fear of men and that she was only there to collect wood to be able to make a chair to her size.

I don't know what the hells went into my head, but if a woman asks me something I become a faithful little dog, even if the woman is a horrible and disgusting troll, with a beautiful voice.

and so we traveled together, for a few hours I helped her gather wood, she wasn't afraid of the fire of the snake men, this should have already made me understand my mistake, but I never said I was smart.

When we collected the wood he needed the sun was going down, she thanked me and I in my arrogance asked if I deserved a reward for my actions, but I was unable to finish the sentence that the troll in front of me disappeared, and an elven woman with pitch-skinned skin and white hair like the moon appeared in her place.

"your reward is not to die this day"

she said, I started to stammer, I think I fell into my knees, I hope Garagos was not seeing me at that moment, Probably my father's spider god was on me, because I was sure I would die that night ...

But I didn't die, she asked for my name, and disappeared in front of me, said it was from a house or something but honestly or completely removed from my mind, I only remember her eyes, her hair, her cruel smile.

Maivert? maybe it was that? I do not remember...

Thanks for the wine, traveler, and for listening to my story, if you ever find yourself in front of a troll who speaks, don't trust, don't fight, and don't run away, do what he asks of you, a little effort and an act of generosity in exchange for your life it's a good deal.

As for me, I've always been a curious person.

[gordan]

Another story from my days at Crow's nest? give me more wine and I'll tell you about it .. Wine, sure, listen to this.

It was two or trhee weeks after my meeting with the drow, I continued to collect a small fortune in gold with my services, and they had sent me to the ruins of Wharftown or whatever the name of that city was.

A small group of bandits had made base on the coast by storming every caravan from the independent port to Bendir, and this was a problem they had sent me to solve.

I went into that outlaw den alone and decimated them, what? you do not believe me? I had several magical scrolls with me and I am somewhat capable of using my blade, however, someone there was better than me.

As you have already understood stranger, I have no luck with women, and that one was a she-devil I assure you, a woman fully equipped with a tower shield and full armor, and by the way she fought she must have been trained, I don't know , but I couldn't hit her.

I believe that even now she is one of the greatest adversaries I have ever met, that was a woman to admire, I assure you, that shield was a fortress, holy Tempus! not a single swing from my sword managed to hit her.

But she hited me, and hited me hard.

I was without bandages, no potions, I was bleeding like a cow at the slaughterhouse, only the fury to keep me alive, I decided to use an old scroll to evoke a stupid badger as a distraction and leave, Garagos would have forgiven me, I hope.

But in the room in here ehmm, I withdrew from the clash with pure strategic meaning there were several barrels of alcoholic beverages, and there while my badger was getting pounded like a goblin in a monastery I started to drink like a sponge ...

Why? because alcholl makes everyone stronger that's why! Loviatar's chest!

And armed with a sword, new courage, strength and smell offered by the great high alcoholic spirit I defeated that armored witch and took the key that she had in order to continue ...

that this story is for you as a traveling teacher, It is not the sword, ax or armor that makes you a warrior, but how much liquid can you swallow before running in battle ... is the wine finished already?

[gordan]

I hate Bendir.

Don't get me wrong, it's a nice village with good people and the most beautiful elves you can imagine if you can't sneak into Myon, but for Valkur's beard if dwarves are idiots.

I had asked that dwarf for directions, I have never been in that area and I had no idea where the crystal caves were, he said "follow the road after Stonehold and you will see them"
And was he wrong? NO! but he forgot to tell me that those caverns are a cursed labyrinth that came out of the sick mind of a troglodyte!

I went deep, I realized something was wrong when the goblins began to be absent and strange beings made of shadows and bizarre bats began to appear, and then I reach a small commercial settlement under the ground managed by ogres .... ogres!

Yes my dear traveler, I ended up in the underdark, or ended down, I'm not sure how it works.

and the funniest part and that I hadn't noticed, I thought it was a very very strange cave but I hadn't seen anything that told me that I was underground, and so I continued to go deep

You have no idea of ​​the dark, luckily I had some scrolls of light, if it were not for that I think I would have fallen into a ravine, and if you can forget the poisonous mushrooms and creatures that want to kill you, eat you, enslave you, sacrificing you or all of these things at the same time is also a strangely nice place compared to the swamps where I am used to traveling ...

Oh forgive me I was digressing ... Other bats, some trolls, slimes and then I met a drow and a strange human, I think it was the drow that made me understand that maybe I was not in a large cave but in Huge cave ...

And oddly enough, they pointed me to the nearest portal to leave the darkness.

I'm starting to think that the Drow are not bad people after all, oh maybe they're kind to me because I wear the spider god symbol on my belt, I don't know ..

however, this is my life, traveling, getting lost, discovering, killing bad things and hoping to join an organization sooner or later.

Which is not easy.

Brandt are gone, Helmites are fanatics, Zhentarim must be desperate to join them and Waynolts don't seem interested in my services

Could I go it alone and start a trade as a guide in the underdark?

This is a brilliant idea! thanks traveler! you were joking? then joke more often that you have great ideas ...