Something is wrong on Arelith.

[The Pretty Prince of Parties]

I will agree with that - a lot of the time, it's poorly done, romance is poorly played off and has no significant impact on the characters involved, their development, their stories, the island's story in general. But that's romance in general: whether it's guy on guy, girl on girl, guy on girl, girl on ho-- Okay, stepping away from Catherine the Great.

I can agree. Most of the time, it's pretty worthless. You'd get much more out of watching Soap Operas. No, really, soap operas are great. Watch them in foreign languages, it's hands down one of the best ways to pick up a new language - the actors are so over the top and super expressive, it makes making connections easy. At least, that's what my brother in law says, and he's been teaching people English as a second language for decades.

[Yma23]

Yo, me again. I got notgibg against gay, guy on guy rp is done mostly great. But in one week of comeback,my char has been hit on by three women, met a lot of gay- bi, and hears everywhere how she dates she and so on. Honestly, what been said before, I am better off watching a tv drama.

I do get where you're coming from, reguarldess of gender ream after ream of random fluffy romance can get a little much. Heck, I've been known to roll my eyes at the third or forth couple.

But here is the thing.

They're having fun. And that's important. And is their fun really so bad that it's utterly destroying -your- fun?

When I really first 'moved' to arelith as my main server, I moved from a server called City of Arabel. City of Arabel was very hard core, but it was fun. Now - the thing that made me really move was an announcement by the Dms, calling for an 'end to social roleplay'. The jist of it came across as, 'If you arn't adventuring/scheming/intreaging Ur Doing It Wrong and Get Off Our Server.'

'But um.. I wanna play a character that has an interesting personal storyline where his characterisation changes depending on his interactions with others and-'
'NO! Go kill stuff! Go Scheme! Go do Adventure! Character Developming is WRONG! No messing around with other characters! No Romance! You are an Hero/Villain and that is it!'
'...'
And so I left.

Because I actualy do -Like- a bit of social roleplay. Honestly I do. I don't like it when that's all there is. I don't like it when that's the only option. But I do enjoy exploring that side of all my characters and, indeed, I don't think there is, or should be, anything wrong with that.

Something we need to remember. Everyone enjoys something different out of roleplay. Some enjoy scheming politicaly. Some enjoy the PvP aspect. Some love adventuring! Othersl adore DM quests. A few just want to snuggle romanticaly. And so forth. There's nothing -wrong- with any of these, until taken into extremes at least.

The answer is to try and encourage people to dabble in all (or almost all) of the above. To enjoy variety, and to tolerate when people are engaging in the sort of rp that you don't, neccesarly, enjoy at all. You dont' have to do it yourself, for the most part, and if it -really- gets too much for you? Either move away from the rp, or give a -very- polite message asking them if they could just please tone it down just a smidge. The majority of people are very reasonable and will.

[Kashisjonny]

What YMA said.
Focus on your own RP and finding groups that you enjoy roleplaying with. Assuming everyone likes the same things that you do is silly. Give some respect to your fellow players and stop giving them a hard time over their RP decisions and what they want to do in their spare time.

[IndifferentPerson]

Oh, wow. Did this thread just get constructive?

[Seven Sons of Sin]

A friend of mine once said they played with people they had fun with. And did not interact with people they did not have fun with. Seems kinda logical, right?

To someone who is so anti-establishment, often the cynics think that high-RPers are all like Amadeo and have the patience of a sage.

This isn't so. Play with who you have fun with.

Unfortunately, this leads to a twisted sense of elitism and exclusiveness, because people think that because person X is a snob and illuminati PvP-loving Snuggybear.

It's a difficult line to toe on, but you should always make fun your priority. Don't drag yourself down being among a certain group of players or characters and trying to change their ways. That isn't fair for you or anyone. Never be afraid to break away from the pack, even be a loner if you have to, to try to find your own fun.

Because people only follow people who are fun. And there are many types and kinds.

[Maragaram]

...I would love to see a two-spirit character in game. I'm pretty sure D&D Next basically gave a similar identity to elven culture.

EDIT: nope. It was intersex. I still think a two-spirit green elf would be a welcome sight though....

Uh... cultural appropriation is not ok. Don't do it.

You are completely right. I mispoke (mistyped?). I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply that players should go ahead and appropriate real world cultural terms for roleplaying - although that line is a bit hazy anyway considering that most of the cultures in FR are basically already appropriations of real world cultures. What I meant to say is that I think it would be cool to see an elf character who approaches their androgyny is a more serious, spiritual way. Considering that D&D elves have often been represented as somewhat androgynous and that D&D Next has confirmed the existence of elves who are intersex and describes them as being made in the image of Corellon Larethian, I would imagine that androgyny might actually play a serious role in elven culture in some respects.

I thought of green elves first since they are the elves who are most in tune with nature and spirits, supposedly, and because they are said to have rare shamans who fulfill important cultural roles within their respective tribes. It just seemed logical to connect the two and think "Oh, wouldn't an intersex/androgynous/gender nonconforming green elf shaman who represents the spiritual/ritualistic side of androgyny in elven culture be a cool idea."

...Although I admit that my choice of green elves was probably influenced a little by the fact that their tribal society bears obviously similarities to modern representations of real world indigenous peoples like the Native Americans, which was probably really rude to said peoples. I did choose the term "green elf' specifically in favor over the other names D&D gives them though. It's pretty clear where descriptors like "wild elf," "feral," and "savage" come from in the context of European colonialism.

Summary: I think a character who represents an androgynous third/fluid/other gender category in an FR culture would be cool to see on Arelith, but said character calling themselves a "two-spirit," "hijra," or any other name for a non-binary gender category belonging to an actual indigenous culture would be taking it too far. I'd rather see people making up new terms to describe similar identities and states of being, not unlike how we now have "Flameborn" and "Windborn/Weaveborn" to describe Path sorcerers in game.

Also, back on the actual topic, I just wanted to second pretty much everything that's been said in the last page or so. If you really don't like someone's RP, just avoid them, I guess? Notells is also a useful feature for that. It's never really come up for me personally, except in extreme examples like the aforementioned sexual harassment scenario, but I can understand why people worry it. I generally find myself RPing with the same players a lot - not because I seek them out specifically, but rather because the characters they play and the types of RP they engage in tend to draw me in. That said, I wouldn't have met a lot of those players if I wasn't willing to test my own limits when roleplaying and try a bunch of different things (like slave/master roleplay, which I now very much enjoy).

So, find what works for you and makes you happy, but don't be afraid to go a little outside of your comfort zone now and then, just to see if there's something else you might enjoy, too.

[SwampFoot]

In any situation that the RP becomes not fun, my character excuses himself and seeks better entertainment. Even in the middle of RP. One does not need to force themselves to continue a line of RP once the fun stops. In a conversation with someone and the ladies won't stop their constant lip smacking/touchy-feely groping's? Move the conversation. Although a fun way to stop them is to become that staring creep that breathes heavy and exudes a sense of "now THIS is entertainment!", and then start drawing pictures of the event for later reference...

[Rattus_norvegicus99]

A friend of mine once said they played with people they had fun with. And did not interact with people they did not have fun with. Seems kinda logical, right?

Ditto ... that is exactly what I do. Do people annoy me sometimes? Of course and I respond by trying to avoid them. If its break the rules annoy - report to DMs, if its not - well ... why stick around?

[DM_Ironfist]

I have never seen so many lesbians on arelith since we actually allow it.
It's getting silly.

Then there is the, lets just be honest, complete fear and thus lack of confrontation. Pvp with rp value.

And the lines between good and evil are gone. If you point out somebody is evil, folk are like, so what?
Some good and evil just happily date.

Is this just me, or am I just not keeping up with todays RP?

Point 1)
If you have an issue or a complaint regarding the server, address it in private to the DM or Admin Team. You've been here more than long enough to be firmly well aware of our negative stance towards forum posts that are either 'So and so is rule breaking.' or 'Group X is doing it wrong.' Cease it. If there is a legitimate complaint there report it.

And to consider - Do you seriously want us, the DM Team, to be policing the sexuality of your characters? Because I really have better things to do.

Point 2) This is nothing but another 'You're doing it wrong' statement. If you find others behaviour sub par, inspire them with your better quality of roleplay. Take the lead in doing it right, and generate some fun. Do not hope to start a flame war in a public forum. If this is a report about specific instances of bad RP - Report it.

Point 3) There are many people that would argue the clear cut lines between Good and Evil being blurred are a good thing. Rarely are characters so two dimensional as to be either Good, Or Evil, and little else. However, as a DM and a player I've seen plenty of clearly ~Good~ Paladins, etc, and plenty of clearly ~Evil~ characters. (Jel Lyons? Vippin?) If you'd like there to be more clearly defined ones, once more, lead by example.

Point 4) Again, this is another 'You're doing it wrong' If there are specific characters causing immersion breaking roleplay by getting off romantically in a way that clearly doesn't make sense. Report it, clearly to the DM Team. Don't post vaguely in the forum.

Point 5) I don't know if you've been keeping up with today's RP or not. Nor does the forum. This sentence does not validate the rest of the post. Heed the warnings as given above.


Several of the rest of you know infinitely better than to post in the manners that you have here, too. Encouraging this kind of thread that just gets some people worked up and offended is not a good way to protect the server or each other. We've said time and time again that we like to keep real life politics and social issues away from this forum, because you ~will~ disagree with each other, and it won't be pretty. We all come here to escape and gameplay, not debate. If you all want to argue with each other, there are other forums, boards, and skype groups you can do it that are not owned by the Admin Team who have made their stance very clear.

A large thank you to those that remained entirely constructive.

[IndifferentPerson]

hue

I'm amazed this wasn't locked yet.

[Full Moon]

Arelith is changing and that cannot be denied. I would guess from observation that the average player age has dropped some. We see it in the lack of sophistication in rp, plots, and the win at all costs mentality which is increasingly common.

Not to say this is a bad thing, it's just the cycle of life. A bar crowd changes, gets younger or older and the previous group moves out. This is happening on a large scale in the UD and to a lesser degree on the surface.

Lesbian PC's are typically played by younger males. It's not because they want to present a unique character idea either. And this is the problem. Gratuitous rp often demeans the legitimate attempts at capturing or exploring an idea. But all you can do is ignore it or roll with it.

I like Arelith but if you are looking for quality rp these days you pretty much have to stay out of the main stream. Sad as that is.

[Anime Sword Fighter]

[Marsi]

Arelith is changing and that cannot be denied. I would guess from observation that the average player age has dropped some. We see it in the lack of sophistication in rp, plots, and the win at all costs mentality which is increasingly common.

Oh? What was the "sophisticated" RP you're talking about, just out of curiosity

[Full Moon]

There was a time when all the plots weren't all about manipulating mechanics.

[LegaciesNeverDie]

There was a time when all the plots weren't all about manipulating mechanics.

That's pretty unkind to say to a lot of people about the plots they run.

[Marsi]

There was a time when all the plots weren't all about manipulating mechanics.

lol

[IndifferentPerson]

[Maphias]

There was a time when all the plots weren't all about manipulating mechanics.

are we seriously still pushing this

even here

[Rystefn]

Lesbian PC's are typically played by younger males.

Yeah... this is a "common wisdom" with exactly nothing to back it up other than "I thought it, so it was right" or "I heard it on the internet." It comes from the same place as "there are no girls on the internet" despite the fact that every woman I know between eighteen and eighty is on the internet.

[Full Moon]

couldn't come from experience I guess ?

[DM_Ironfist]

Folks, I'm sensing I wasn't clear enough before. Knock off the infighting. This is not doing any of us, or Arelith any good.

If I was a prospective new player to this server, and this is the first thing I read upon joining the forum (Which given it's title, I might) I'd be never logging back in again. Is this really what you all want to be representing the community?

We're all on the same side. Play nice.

[IDidNotDoIt]

Folks, I'm sensing I wasn't clear enough before. Knock off the infighting. This is not doing any of us, or Arelith any good.

If I was a prospective new player to this server, and this is the first thing I read upon joining the forum (Which given it's title, I might) I'd be never logging back in again. Is this really what you all want to be representing the community?

We're all on the same side. Play nice.

I can flip that on you,

Imagion you are new and your experience is desperate lesbian elves.

Or a bit later, You get invited to overhrow the evil government of Bendir.
You get all excited, Buy a new sword and imagion these great pvp battles.

Then this guy gives you 10 k and says, Vote on him.

Or you want to play a good guy, Maybe even paladin, But you can't pvp mister 63 black skull helmet cause he is a really nice guy and to pvp him would make you a social outcast.

I didn't send this privately to a DM, Cause it is an issue I have between the players.
And therefor I want to talk with the players.

Not a bunch of behind the scene DM's of which I can not know if they actually do something with it.

And sorry that I think this way, But I play arelith with them, Not the DM's.

[Xarge VI]

I feel the need to say that there -are- plots going on, usually one just has to be active enough in their search for them as the people with a lot of fun things to do rarely spend time in front of the Nomad.

Good way to get involved is to start making noise yourself, players of interesting characters want to play with characters that are interesting and do interesting things.

[Marsi]

yeah, there's plenty going on, considering it's a fairly quiet time of the year. If you're not getting involved, you only have yourself to blame.

[Artos13]

A lot of points in this thread that I can't possibly address them all, but I will say this:

Arelith is built for freedom of play, as long as its all in character. We strive to make a place that satisfies many different kinds of players. Problems typically arise when one type of player feels that other types of players should be contributing to their type of play.

"There are too many (Social RP) players around" can be translated to: "I can't find enough people to go adventuring with"

"Everyone is grinding dungeons" can be translated to: "I can't find people to socialize with about my schemes"

"There isn't anything interesting in these shops" can be translated to: "There aren't enough people crafting cool things like I do"

It's all about feeling left out, or that the server is "heading in the wrong direction" (which is, of course, away from whatever style you like). We've seen cycles of this kind of stuff happen since the dawn of time, and I can promise you this: It will change. And then it will change again.

Specifically concerning lesbians: I think about a year ago or so I made a "ruling" about officially not giving a damn about gender roles on Arelith, as official policy. This was after reading the perception that the Dev Team here had an anti-gay agenda (which I guess I never got the memo about, so maybe I am out of the loop ) We don't have an anti-gay agenda, or much of an agenda at all. We just want to provide a place that people can have fun in, and build lasting friendships.

You guys self-police yourselves far more than is realized, and sometimes I feel as if the Dev Team is getting the credit. Never underestimate the power that you all have collectively to shape the direction that this thing goes in.