Write a Joke Suggestion!

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AstralUniverse
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by AstralUniverse » Tue Dec 08, 2020 8:11 am

New available greater/major award - a blind person:

- cannot gain ab from str and dex, only zen archery
- cannot run
- -50 spot penalty
- +10 listen bonus
- Blind immunity (mechanically speaking)
Svrtr wrote:

I've spoken with Kenji and warpriest will be allowed to take elemental avatar so keep this in mind too


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ADDK
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by ADDK » Tue Dec 08, 2020 10:36 pm

Epic-level gelatinous cubes now spawn exclusively on transitions, every transition. They are renamed to Transition Cube.
Paris Volkova, depression ranger
Gideon Nonagesimus, Squire of the Pallid Mask

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hmm
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by hmm » Wed Dec 16, 2020 5:02 am

FOOD AND WATER
eating to %150 Food will give you +1 Strength, -1 Dexterity, and -10 Movement Speed because you're carrying a Food-Baby.

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Bunnysmack
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Bunnysmack » Wed Dec 16, 2020 5:20 pm

The wild mage spell "Chaos Shield" is now replaced with "Chaos Sword." The next spell casted is guaranteed to surge not just once, but 1+CL/5 times in a row. Between 1 and 7 surges will all trigger in succession to one another, there is no control over whether those surges will be beneficial or detrimental to the caster.
"You're insufferable..."
"That's not true! I can totally be suffered!"

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Ninjimmy
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Ninjimmy » Wed Dec 16, 2020 5:26 pm

Once every six months, everyone's alignment swaps.
Failure to stick to your new alignment leads to an RPR penalty.

Once a year, everyone's class swaps.
Playing:
Olwin (AKA Olicoros Vrozt Akael Shilligg Jugem Dojj Winzalfur AKA That £$%^ing Wizard)

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Petrifictus
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Petrifictus » Thu Dec 17, 2020 6:07 am

The Animal Companions and Familiars now poop. Please bring a trash pouch for their pick ups if you walk them at the settlement or NPC Guards give you a fine.
Repeated failures to do so will mark you as Outcast.
https://petrifications.deviantart.com/
Gnome Wotan Woodberry - (Shelved)
Goblin Toymaker Karma - (Rolled)
Ogre Karstaag da Main Man - (Active)

KnifeParty
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by KnifeParty » Thu Dec 17, 2020 10:34 am

-Cursed materials: craft something using them will always fail with no godsave. There is no way to know if they´re cursed.

-The Church of Flat Toril is about to open somewhere.

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Bunnysmack
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Bunnysmack » Thu Dec 17, 2020 11:31 pm

-makesafe Is no longer used for unsticking a PC.

Instead, upon typing "-makesafe" your PC will immediately start yelling out procedurally generated statements under the shout toggle about how an enemy has infiltrated the area. Additionally, your PC will automatically hostile and draw weapons against all other PCs/NPCs in the instance (if no weapon is in your inventory, you are instead equipped with a make-shift pointed stick), and the condition will then force all other nearby PCs to make will saves or be struck with the same condition.
"You're insufferable..."
"That's not true! I can totally be suffered!"

Exordius
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Exordius » Fri Dec 18, 2020 2:57 am

Rename the Dale as the Shire and rename Bendir as Hobbiton. Because why not lol.

Gaal
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Gaal » Thu Dec 24, 2020 5:38 pm

The more people you get to worship your character, the more power you gain.

Perem, El Grotto de Gnome


Gaal
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Gaal » Thu Dec 24, 2020 5:42 pm

The only way you can become a leader of a settlement is to have taken Noble Reward.

Perem, El Grotto de Gnome


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EnigmaticSpirit
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by EnigmaticSpirit » Thu Dec 24, 2020 6:33 pm

Kya, chatting to Jeren on the way back from the Tower after the attack:
"How many ears does Edward Cordor have? Three. His left ear, his right ear, and the Cordor Frontier."

I'll get my coat.


AstralUniverse
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by AstralUniverse » Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:15 pm

EnigmaticSpirit wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 6:33 pm
Kya, chatting to Jeren on the way back from the Tower after the attack:
"How many ears does Edward Cordor have? Three. His left ear, his right ear, and the Cordor Frontier."

I'll get my coat.
You are now required to right a joke suggestion. Something funny that will never get approved.
Svrtr wrote:

I've spoken with Kenji and warpriest will be allowed to take elemental avatar so keep this in mind too


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EnigmaticSpirit
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by EnigmaticSpirit » Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:52 pm

AstralUniverse wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:15 pm
EnigmaticSpirit wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 6:33 pm
Kya, chatting to Jeren on the way back from the Tower after the attack:
"How many ears does Edward Cordor have? Three. His left ear, his right ear, and the Cordor Frontier."

I'll get my coat.
You are now required to right a joke suggestion. Something funny that will never get approved.
Rename the Cordor Frontier to Edward Cordor's Final Frontier? :P


AstralUniverse
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Joined: Sun Dec 15, 2019 2:54 pm

Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by AstralUniverse » Fri Dec 25, 2020 2:04 am

EnigmaticSpirit wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:52 pm
AstralUniverse wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:15 pm
EnigmaticSpirit wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 6:33 pm
Kya, chatting to Jeren on the way back from the Tower after the attack:
"How many ears does Edward Cordor have? Three. His left ear, his right ear, and the Cordor Frontier."

I'll get my coat.
You are now required to right a joke suggestion. Something funny that will never get approved.
Rename the Cordor Frontier to Edward Cordor's Final Frontier? :P
That's much better *sage nod*
Svrtr wrote:

I've spoken with Kenji and warpriest will be allowed to take elemental avatar so keep this in mind too


Altair01
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Altair01 » Mon Mar 22, 2021 12:31 pm

Make ooze a playable race.

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Ninjimmy
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Ninjimmy » Mon Mar 22, 2021 1:31 pm

A new background for commoners, "Angry Mob" that allows you to spawn 10 followers all armed with pitchforks and torches.
Playing:
Olwin (AKA Olicoros Vrozt Akael Shilligg Jugem Dojj Winzalfur AKA That £$%^ing Wizard)

xanrael
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by xanrael » Mon Mar 22, 2021 2:13 pm

All alignments but True Neutral now require 30 RPR and a Normal reward.

Deryliss
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Deryliss » Mon Mar 22, 2021 2:43 pm

The Bless spell no longer gives ab/damage as per default NWN.

Instead, the effect varies based on the deity of the caster, providing an intangible benefit defined by the dogma of each religion. The exact list is kept secret for FOIG reasons, but we encourage our players to experiment. Remember to tip a coin to your local priest of the Bitch Queen before you set out to sea.... just in case.

(bonus points: Behind the scenes there's no mechanical benefits, just confirmation bias and paranoia).
Marijani, Priestess of Istishia

Straxus
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Straxus » Mon Mar 22, 2021 3:03 pm

Spellswords awarded one summon, but lose their familiar, the attack Newt!
Arod (semi-retired)
Jacho Blake

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Bunnysmack
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Bunnysmack » Mon Mar 22, 2021 3:21 pm

All spiders gain 100% damage immunity vs. Drow.
"You're insufferable..."
"That's not true! I can totally be suffered!"

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Dari
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Dari » Wed Mar 24, 2021 6:01 pm

Whenever an ogre throws a boulder at you he yells: "Heads up."
Henry Crowe - Dead

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Airport Proximity Jesus
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Airport Proximity Jesus » Thu Mar 25, 2021 1:01 am

Pale masters self-palming to death is returned, but will now also cause them to explode in an irresistible disease, poison, and curse effect that only goes away when you walk over a water tile for everyone in a hellball sized area
8-) Cool kids wear shades during the endless night 8-)

Altair01
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Altair01 » Sun Mar 28, 2021 12:49 am

Using the -language command now prohibits further language learning for 5 RL minutes.

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Fargreze
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Re: Write a Joke Suggestion!

Post by Fargreze » Mon Apr 05, 2021 6:57 am

Implement a once-per-round fortitude save of a DC equal to character level, rolled against the latest skill, Breathe (a class skill for every class but Barbarian). A failed check takes off 5HP and adds a two-round debuff to all skills, of the same amount.

Failing the check twice in a row leads to unconsciousness and collapse (visually resembles knockdown), three times is death.

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