A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

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c0dfish
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A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by c0dfish » Mon Nov 25, 2024 4:39 pm

Strap in, this is about to get sappy.
CW: Discussion of cancer and death.

On August 6th, 2023, my dad had a seizure and had to be rushed to the hospital. Less than three days later, he's in surgery to have a tumor the size of a dime removed from the left side of his brain.

This came out of nowhere. His doctor described it as a "lightning strike." No way to have predicted it or prevented it. My dad was a very healthy man before August 6th--he'd never had a seizure before, hadn't been hospitalized in 20 years, didn't get so much as a cold. Ate right, exercised daily, didn't smoke, barely drank.

Last night, after almost a year and a half of valiantly fighting cancer, my dad passed away in his sleep. He was 62 years old.

I was very close to my dad. He was one of my best friends. I was a really quiet kid growing up, but I could always open up to him. He was a wonderful listener.

I love to read--he inspired that love in me. Some of my fondest memories are of sitting on his lap while he read me A Christmas Carol or The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. There was nothing I loved more than discussing books and movies and music and art with him.

I can't described to you all how hard this year has been. It's surreal to watch a healthy man whittled away by an incurable disease, knowing that there's nothing you can do.

Arelith has been a much-needed escape for me. When I am overwhelmed by my grief and anger, Arelith has been there for me.

I like to play tragic characters. I like to play characters who are doomed from the start; who know the ending won't be pretty and choose to keep going anyways. It gives me hope, in a weird way. Or, at least, it gives me a different perspective on all of my own little tragedies.

I'm writing this post because I want to thank you all, each and every one of you, for helping me through this last year, whether you knew it or not. This community is truly a gem. Thank you for letting me play with you.

This is an incomplete list, I'm sure, but kudos are deserved for the following:

Tera'thiel Eldafire/Timir Kenthenn: From the wise old paladin teaching Glaisne and Rin how to smite evil, to the obnoxious wizard cult guild leader, you've been a huge reason why I've kept logging onto Arelith day after day. Thank you so much for helping me tell Rin's story.

Elrohir Talath: My buddy. You're like the little brother I never had (if he was German).

Elinda Leonall: Rin's bestie and adopted. I love the antics we get up to together--from the pixie union to your literal wedding. You never fail to make me laugh.

Sylvan: For always working for the good of the collegium.

Thalantyr Leyensbane: For helping Rin in his every dire strait, and for teaching him the basics of economics.

Richard Webber: For being Rin's evil boyfriend, and one of my favorite characters on this server. What you've done with the Keep is truly incredible.

Ellianara Jadys'varilo (I definitely misspelled that): For giving Rin the chance at forgiveness. Maybe one day he'll take it.

Fain: For being one of the many reasons that Rin is so obsessed with the fey. You're a wonderful writer, and I could listen to you talk for hours.

Nate Jingle: For giving Rin his dream job, and (trying) to leave him the inn.

Jago Daevhi: For being literally THE coolest character I have met on this server. You're an insanely good writer--I strive to be able to write half as well as you do. Roleplaying with Jago is always a treat.

Hanna/Mayrel Selm: For helping Rin revitalize the inn (whether he likes it or not). You two crack me up on the daily. I can't wait to see what shenanigans you have in store next.

Mystic: For getting me back into this game in the first place, and letting me drag you back in as well.

"Lumen": For being Rin's mentor, for being his guiding star, and for being my rock IRL. You are the love of my life and my best friend. I can't believe how lucky I am to be married to you.

Other noteworthy folks who deserve kudos as well:

Flandal
Igor
Zargoth
Vast Peace
Abaros
Eppi
Azalin Blackcloak
Autumn van der Witte
Samantha Lockeheart
Mana Sae'ta
Zzyvyr
Wren Thornfield
Pymjarra
Maria Ryder

...and obviously many more. I definitely forgot some people, but I promise to add to this list if I remember.

And, of course, a HUGE thank you to all the DMs and developers who work so tirelessly to make this game so much fun. You're all rockstars!

Previous:
Orion Kross

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Rin Kyo


good man of god
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by good man of god » Mon Nov 25, 2024 5:32 pm

I'm very sorry to hear about your father, c0dfish.

I'm glad you had a good relationship with him, and that you have healthy escapes that help you with the tough parts of life.

Sending you good vibes all the way from the UK.

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D4wN
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by D4wN » Mon Nov 25, 2024 8:25 pm

I am very sorry for your loss

Currently playing:
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LurkingShadow
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by LurkingShadow » Mon Nov 25, 2024 11:26 pm

Stories like this always brings a tear. Not of joy but sorrow. Stay strong! And this once more, shows the good sides of the internet. How a community can be a support even by just existing and being an escape from the grim IRL. Stay strong!


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Irongron
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by Irongron » Mon Nov 25, 2024 11:44 pm

There is much I could say to this, indeed I wrote a lengthier text but deleted before posting - sadly I need be careful about posting any details of my own personal life. Suffice to say I can very much empathize with, and relate to your situation.

Finding strength and comfort from your interactions and the general creative community of Arelith is great. Sometimes, when done right, it is hard to feel alone here. I understand too, the desire to let others know how much you appreciate them as such times.

One aspect of Arelith I will never get tired of (or stop valuing) is just how earnest our players can be, both in and out of character - it's certainly a breathe of fresh air in an otherwise (often) cynical digital existence.

I'm also always grateful for those that use the bar system to take places like Mayfields and really turn them into living environments, and I'm glad to read about anyone enjoying that.

All the best in the days and weeks to come, at what I know must be a difficult time.


TheDoctor
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by TheDoctor » Tue Nov 26, 2024 4:49 pm

My mother went the same way. Gaming helped but I didnt really start to heal until I came back to arileth.

Fast foward a few years and now I am dealing with my fathers issues I wont really go into details with but.. Very similiar.

Arileth has kept me sane this last year and I am hoping will continue to do so as time, and dads issues progress.

IF you ever want to talk or need a shoulder DM me.


TheDoctor
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by TheDoctor » Tue Nov 26, 2024 4:51 pm

Irongron wrote:
Mon Nov 25, 2024 11:44 pm

There is much I could say to this, indeed I wrote a lengthier text but deleted before posting - sadly I need be careful about posting any details of my own personal life. Suffice to say I can very much empathize with, and relate to your situation.

I did too and then made it much short and sweeter. Longer talks are for DM's when it comes to this sort of thing indeed.


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Dovesong
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by Dovesong » Tue Nov 26, 2024 8:19 pm

Cancer took my dad as well. I was not close to him, at all, but I can understand losing what might have been, as well as memories of better times.

<3 We're here for you.

Im'kiira Harthglen Teu'aerron - Priestess of Eilistraee and all-around Party Girl.

Itsumi Amne - "I guess the discipline just didn't take!"


Sundial
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by Sundial » Wed Nov 27, 2024 3:09 am

I wish you well on the healing road ahead.

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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by Horse and Rider » Wed Nov 27, 2024 3:44 am

Thank YOU for playing with ME :)

I only wish I could play more. Or maybe just earlier in the day.


Grunf
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by Grunf » Wed Nov 27, 2024 3:37 pm

Unfortunate i could add (as i am sure many others too) to this story from my personal life, so glad that Arelith did provide to You as it did to me, but so did also doing sport, going out with friends, spending time in nature and learning ( go for all! ☝️🧐)...seeing the World as beauty as it is beyond grim sides of it, its event better then Arelith (sorry DEVs.💁 :lol: ).

As for Your toon, i seen it m8, ITS GREAT!!!🤗 Keep on Rockin!🤟🤜🤛💥💨

Magnar(Shadowy Banker and Investor) - DEAD
Damien Tagnik'Zurr (The Pathfinder) - Somewhere
Kurgan (Khaneesi War-Drummer) - DEAD


chocolatelover
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by chocolatelover » Thu Nov 28, 2024 12:16 am

So sorry to hear about your father. I, too, have used Arelith to help ease the pain of loss and... well, life.

I hope the times ahead are a bit brighter. Relish your memories.


c0dfish
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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by c0dfish » Fri Nov 29, 2024 7:03 pm

Thank you to everyone for your heartfelt replies. I'm so lucky to be able to play with such a wonderful community.

Previous:
Orion Kross

Current:
Rin Kyo


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Re: A thank you from Whidershin's humble bar manager...

Post by Hanover Fiste » Sun Dec 01, 2024 3:46 pm

Hug from afar. As you hear the stories, and tell your own, of your father's adventures, revel in how he impacted others. These memories will last your lifetime.

My father passed in his sixties thirty years ago in a similar fashion. And now, I'm in my sixties. Your post serves to remind all players that we don't know what is occurring behind the keyboard with our online friends.

Thank you for sharing. Thanks for your RP. And as a certain Priestess from Waterdeep might offer, "Ve vish joo vell!"


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