Paladins are people, and they're different. They all worship different gods, have different priorities, ect.
Some will be militant
Some will be persuasive
Some will be compassionate.
Some will be Furious.
Some will be scolarly.
Some will follow the law no matter what.
Some will answer to their Lord.
Some will be almost vigilantees.
So on. So forth.
Having paladins who are kind and gentle and keen on redemption is awsome! Great!
Having Paladins who are furious and angry, and want to go out and smite that evil is also fantastic!
Having the debate about which is 'right' is also awsome - let's do that In Game and In Character though.
This sort of conversation crops up every now and then, and Paladin is literaly the only class where people have huge Opinions about how they're to be played.
"For Verily, only I knoweth how to play a Paladin! For Our Lord and Savior Gygax hath touched me 'pon the Brow, and given me the Holy Roleplay Sight, with alloweth me to understand the Way and Nature of a Paladin! Those who art not doing it accoding to HIS HOLY VISION art Wrong and Bad and should not Play Paladins! For Only I knoweth! Only I can Judge what maketh a Good Paladin! The Only Sort of Paladin there is! AND THUS! I SAY UNTO THEE! UNWASHED MASSES! IF Thou art not playing a Paladin as I say, thou souldeth not be playing A Paladin At All! For I am Knoweth All and Seeth all and Understandeth all! And I know HOW this class should be played! And I have /suffered/ to play this Conceptr! Oh I have been pained and tormented! And I know that TRUE ROLEPLAY ELEET! who's fingers SING upon the KEYBOARDS of HOLYNESS may play True Paladins! And UNLESS you play them EXACTLY as I say! In EXACTLY the right measure of Mercy! Fury! And Passion, then I say unto thee. NAY! Thou shalt not play a Paladin! THOU SHALT NOT!"
Or something like this, anyway.
Let's get something streight.
You Cannot Play A Perfect Paladin in a Multiplayer Environment Like Arelith.
Consider this statement a moment, and let that sink in.
The Alignment system, was never meant to be used in the sort of mass player environment we use. In a Pen and Paper, it works because the Dm knows the players, can talk to the players on a constant one-to-one basis, and can adaquatly work out their concept. In arleith, that sort of micromanagement isn't avaiable.
For the 'law/chaos' side of it, there's the simple question of: - Does it mean 'external' law, or 'internal' law? Does being 'lawful' mean a Paladin has to follow all laws? Or if they judge the laws wrong, can they follow the tenants of their heart?
The obvious answer is 'a bit of both' but for some that'd never be a good response. See above argument.
The more well trodden argument goes back to the Good/Evil divide. Or the argument between Means and Ends.
People say 'Good/Evil is Objective in the Realms, not Subjective as in RL'
This is true. The problem is, however, that Real Life is Subjective, and how we play our characters, and judge other characters is, as such, subjective. And unless the DMs want to put up a massive list of actions that are Always Always Always Always good/Evil, covering every single possible option, it'll remain so.
Let's use the example of the Trolly Problem.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trolley_problem
The short idea of this is - There is a train coming down some tracks, but the tracks diverge. On one track is five people, tied down. This is the track the train is on and it will kill them. On the other track is one person, tied down. You can make the train switch tracks to the other one - just killing one person. But that means you activly chose for someone to die. Or you can not do so, and let the other five die.
To us this is a discussion. Is it right to take an active choice to kill someone, even if it will save others?
But in theory, in the Realms, this isn't a discussion. Good Is Objective. One of the options is Good. the other is Not.
So to go back to Paladins - either
a) It is never right to jump to violence. You need to give that warlock over there a chance. Yeah, maybe he'll torture/maim/sacrifice/murder 1000 people because you gave him a chance, but the thing is - you gave him a Chance and that's the Good Thing To Do.
b) It's never right to let a known practitioner of evil escape. Someone has sold their soul to the devils/demons/fey and they are now a menace to society that needs to be put down. Maybe they could be saved, but the risk just isn't worth it!
Which one of those is ALWAYS the right hting to do?
Well obviously - neither! And different characters, different paladins, are going to swing different ways, to different extremes on how to deal with that, and other, situations.
Yeah, of course there are extremes where you go 'uh, are you really playing your class?' But I think most of the time they should be treated as extremes, and leeway should be given for people to play their conceps. We dont' see nearly the amount of judgement and such for say, Blackguards as we do for Paladins. And that's hardly fair.
So yeah, just chill guys. If you think there's a massive alignment breach going on, report it. Otherwise, why not take the debate In Game? It's fertile ground for roleplay after all.