This is always going to be a balence
On the one hand, we should be kind, courtious, considerate ect of our fellow players.
On the other we're playing characters, and IC actions have IC consequences.
The balence is being able to play your character, and implement the above whilst also doing your best to make sure other people have fun.
And here's the kicker.
It won't always work.
Sometimes you'll do your absolute darn bloomin' best to try and make sure the other people are having fun, you'll work to be as considerate and courtious as you can, but you just can't do so whilst maintaining your character. Sometimes the other person is unreasonable. Sometimes you misjudge the situation. Sometimes you make a bad call. It happens.
But if you work to that balence. to try and play your character whilst, occasionaly bending aspects of it, and seeing things from other peoples perspective - if you can work to try and be especially courtieous and well meaning and kind to those who oppose you ICly, then things tend to work out more often than not.
Just do your best and be kind.
This too shall pass.
(I now have a DM Discord (I hope) It's DM GrumpyCat#7185 but please keep in mind I'm very busy IRL so I can't promise how quick I'll get back to you.)